The Jackleg

Hello again and Happy Friday! I am glad those of you who went to Columbia got to witness a victory, although be it a close one. This week's pic is somewhat dear to my heart because I took it myself back at the 2005 Cocktail Party. I couldn't believe my Bulldawg eyes when I saw this jackleg moseying down the sidewalk. He must be the official cold sore of the gaytor nation! He looks like he was dreesed by a blind, short bus kid. Even his fellow gaytor ass-soldiers were openly mocking the poor ninnyhammer. He is the lone reason I am pro-choice. The world should not have to suffer his existence. Let's get it done in the desert tomorrow and bring the ruckus back to Athens town for Bama next weekend. See ya'll next week. HOW BOUT THEM DAWGS!!!

Anal Conquistador

Greetings Dawg fans. I had a slight bump in the road of life during the last couple of weeks and hope you will accept my apology for my absence. With that out of the way, what in the unholy hell is up with this anal conquistador? For some reason, this needledick has chosen to be the Santa of all douchebags! However, instead of taking Dawg fans' milk and cookies and leaving them toys, he will more than likely take your last bit of sanity and leave you a strong desire to commit 1st degree murder. I need to go take about three Goody's just from looking at this gaytor tattooed waste! Unfortunately, I will not be making the trip to Columbia this weekend. For those of you who are going, drink some bourbon, talk some trash, kick some gamecock ass if need be and bring back a Georgia win. GO DAWGS!!! Until next week...

Gold Star Winner

A Dawg hello to all. I cannot believe the season is finally upon us. I am super fired up and want everyone to know that I am totally committed to verbally abusing the gaytor nation for the next 4 months! With that being said, I’ve got a gold star winner for you this week. Look at this jerk-off. Better yet, check out the look on his face. It appears as if he is suddenly realizing what an absolute power tool he is and that by painting himself up like that (nipples included), he has further disgraced his worthless family’s already piss poor name. He is even wearing a braided belt for Christ’s sake!!! That alone is worthy of several minutes of water torture at Guantanamo. There isn’t another University in the nation that would welcome this fanny bandit on its campus, except maybe Georgia Tech. Have a great weekend and I’ll see you next week after our #1 team in the nation dismantles Georgia Southern. Cheers!

Frodo Douchebaggins

Good afternoon everyone. I realize that not much can live up to last week’s pic, but I’ll give it a go anyway. Check out Frodo Douchebaggins! I find it odd how this portly hobbit appears to be in a church being that he looks like one of the most unholy chodes I have ever laid eyes upon! I bet God threw up in his own mouth a little the second he waltzed through the cathedral doors. Nice tie! It looks like the backdrop for a kids Olan Mills portrait circa 1991. Keep living your life this way and I’m sure that even your gaytor fan church buddies will intentionally leave you in the confines of your parents’ basement on Sunday mornings. See ya’ll next week. Amen!

Ass Master General

Greetings once again and please brace yourself. God bless even the gator fans that had to sit in the same section as this ass master general. It’s almost like this swampish skeez rolled out of bed and wondered “how revolting can I actually make myself today?” He looks like one of the bounty huntin’ brothers on “DOG.” That mullet is something everyone (male and female) in Gainesville should strive for. The only remote pleasure this picture brings me is knowing that the Dawgs eventually beat his team’s face in that day; that and the possibility that someone might have actually launched him over the rail shortly after this pic was taken. Hang in there ya’ll. Only 16 more days! Until next time…

The Drano Skag

Greetings to all,

It has been a long time and I hope the last several months have treated you well. Today is the 30th of July which means that REAL college football begins in just one month (Tech playing Jacksonville State via the internet on a Thursday night just doesn’t count in my book). Unfortunately, this also means that the absent minded scrotebags known as the Gator Nation will soon begin to crawl out of their double wide domiciles and irritate the living piss out of everyone. And that is why I am here; to provide you with weekly examples of why these wastes are the absolute worst fans in all college football or any sport. Just look at this skag. He is THE living, breathing stereotype of “Florida fan.” The mullet, the jersey, the jorts…it is just too perfect! He looks like one of those perverts that would get caught up in a sting operation on “To Catch a Predator.” As far as I’m concerned, there isn’t enough Drano on the shelves at my local Kroger for this douche to swallow down. OK, maybe that’s a little harsh but I am just waaay too fired up about this season. I will be back next week and every week thereafter until the season concludes. See you then and GO DAWGS!!!

Year 2 update

I have been sending out my weekly emails, but have forgotten to post them on the blog page. Sorry for the delay.

Week 29

Good morning everyone. I realize it has been a while and for that I do apologize. Things have been a little crazy but I am back now to call down the thunder for the cocktail party weekend. I debated long and hard about what to bring to the table this week. Since I’ve been M.I.A., I thought about making up for it with several pics for the weeks I took off. Then I received a nice collage of at least 30 gator douchebags all wearing jean shorts which would have worked rather nicely. I have a couple of excellent pics that are on www.ajc.com right now, but I am pretty sure photoshop was used somewhere along the line. So…although it is probably not the most humorous pic I’ve ever submitted, I have decided to go with the following.


First of all, let me say that Tebow is a very good athlete who is having an outstanding season (arguably the best by any QB in the country). Now with THAT out of the way…I am so sick to my stomach of hearing how fantastic this gator, “Superman” piece of shit is. Florida has NO running game, so he runs the ball 20+ times a game for better than average results behind a tricky offense that is difficult to defend WHOEVER the QB may be. After a loss to Auburn, he runs directly to the locker room without shaking the hand of a single Auburn player or coach. After losing the LSU game, he did the same, only this time he did so with tears flowing down his bitch-ass face. Yet, after he runs his tank-ass across the goal line in Lexington last week, it is totally acceptable for him to do the “gator chomp” towards the Kentucky student section. What a pampas prick! The way he looks, from the smart-ass smirk to the Forrest Gump haircut to the stick-on eye black he wears with little gators in the middle, enrages me to a level that could turn a preacher into a serial killer! Oh well, he couldn’t have picked a better University to attend. It is almost ironic how well he represents Florida’s school, fans, and way of life in general. The Dawgs may lose yet again this weekend, but I’ll make the long drive home Sunday thanking the good lord that I am a University of Georgia football fan and not some self-righteous jackass who just doesn’t get it. Have a great weekend. GO DAWGS!!!

Week 28

Greetings once again people. I almost feel bad about this week’s pic. From the looks of it, this tiny little douche has probably been the butt of COUNTLESS jokes since the day he crawled out of his trash mother’s retched womb. But then again, he is the one who made the conscious decision to become a gator fan and therefore is the taint of humanity…so to hell with him! Oh well, the Dawgs have a huge one this weekend in Knoxville. UT fans are only slightly higher on the totem pole of decency compared to gator fans so I thought I’d throw in a nice Vol trash pic to get you fired up (or possibly sick to your stomach) for the weekend.

Week 27

Well it’s Friday and I have to quickly throw something together to get the pic out this week. However, after a very quick search, this gobbler popped up and I need not look any further. This one will have to speak for itself, since I’m in a rush. By the way, HOW BOUT EM last week against Bama? Hope to see many of you tomorrow as the Dawgs prepare for another battle between the hedges. Cheers and GO DAWGS!!!

Week 26

Greetings, I’m back as promised for round two this week. Are these skags for real? If that one bungler was not actually wearing a gator shirt, I’d bet my next paycheck that this pic was taken at a NASCAR race (probably Talladega) in the 1980’s. But it wasn’t. It was taken at the swamp where on any given Saturday in the fall you can find enough denim to clothe the nation of Zaire and enough hair gel to hold together a space shuttle. We have a big one on tap for this weekend folks. So put on your finest red and black attire and pull the Dawgs through with a “W” over those laughable losers from the west. Cheers!

Week 25

My apologies to everyone for dropping the ball last week. I guess a piss poor loss to the Evil Genius had my brain all jacked up. I will however try and make it up to everyone with two pics this week. Even after heart breaking defeat, I lay in bed that Saturday eve and thanked the good Lord that my parents had the kind heart not to let me turn out like this turd. No number of wins can justify representing yourself or your team like a total horse’s ass! May God help him because I’m sure Hell will spit him back out after having to listen to him (or even look at him) for more than five minutes! Stay tuned. I’ll be back later this week…

Week 24

Hello to all. Well, this past weekend was fantastic with the Dawgs whoopin up on the Cowgirls for a nice 1-0 start to the season. Throw in a Tennessee loss and the weekend was almost perfect. The one blemish would be yet another gator win. With that being said, no number of wins can compensate for the infinite douchebaggery that consumes these soulless zombies…just look at these three! Let’s get super rowdy and pull the Dawgs through to another “W” this weekend against another douche, the Ol’ Ball Coach. HOW BOUT EM’!

Week 23

How big of a universal nobody do you have to be for other nobodies to treat you like the plague in the shittiest of ALL places…THE SWAMP? I almost feel sorry for this paltry siff. He put forth the effort to get all painted up, put on a clown wig and some awesome galoshes, then couldn’t even get enough jort wearing losers (four pair in this picture alone by my count) to scream for the gators with him like a fairy tale princess. At least he’ll have plenty of orange and blue comrades in Hell one day. It’s game week people. HOW BOUT THEM DAWGS! Until next time…

Week 22

I’m just gonna post this pic of these flaming idiots and let you all come up with a caption of your own. This one should be really easy! One week until UGA football people! Next week…

Week 21

First of all, my apologies for this week’s pic being a couple of days late. Contrary to these pics, I actually try to think about Florida football and it’s “given up on life” fans as little as possible. Anyway, could someone please tell me which one of these guys’s mother’s basement these World of Warcraft playing nobodies crawled out of? Did they even look at themselves before they walked out the door wearing these Halloween costumes? I’m sure they left Tempe after this game, drove straight to San Francisco (in their Miatas or Del Sols) and just waited it out for gay pride week. They didn’t even have to change their attire. To hell with them! Next week…

Week 20

Dear God, someone call Jared Fogle because we have an emergency! On top of being a useless, waste of space gator fan, this water ass takes up enough space for 2 of them (maybe 2 ½). Maybe a couple years of a strict 6 inch veggie sub a day diet could get this trash barge down to about 3 bills. Then, he could at least fit into some jean shorts that don’t require an elastic waistband! See you next week…

Week 19

Let me start by saying that I do realize this is far from the best pic I’ve ever sent. I just think it shows a nice range of Florida trash. You’ve got Tank-ass on the left with the jersey straight off the Wal-Mart rack, Little Miss Sunshine, Token who just showed up because Grambling wasn’t playing that weekend, and Brady Bunch on the right who is letting everyone know how many testicles he has. I know Hooters’ was thrilled to have these imbeciles come through the door and gator chomp the day away. It’s enough to make Jesus sick. Have a great week and as always…TO HELL WITH FLORIDA!!!

Week 18

From the look on these idiots’ faces, most would likely get the impression that something negative just happened to their team on the football field. I on the other hand get the impression that these two assnecks happened to look up simultaneously, spot themselves on the big screen in their circus attire, then both realize for the first time how truly pathetic they are in every single aspect of their lives. To hell with every last damn one of them (especially these two white owl smokers)!!! See you next week…

Week 17

First of all, may God and baby Jesus give me the strength to get through typing this without having a brain aneurysm! It will more than likely take a Christmas miracle! Check out this deranged, flubberhuster of a woman! I guess the two nice men with straightjackets must have stepped aside just long enough for the photographer to take this brain numbing pic. The only way this psycho should ever be let out of whatever mental health facility this was taken at, is if she is strapped to a very tiny red and black a-bomb then dropped right on the 50 yard line of Ben Hill Griffin Stadium (while the gators are playing Tennessee). Let us all pray that she never had any denim loving offspring to maintain her gator shrine room once she is gone, which hopefully is sooner than later.